"AnD I ThinK To MyseLF, WhaT a WonderfuL WorLD" (10/18/08)

I feel like now is as good a time as any to write a couple of thoughts down. Amidst the hustle and bustle of school and all the stress that accompanies it, I find myself realizing how truly important it is to enjoy each moment that life brings. I feel as if I blink my eyes once at the beginning of the week and blink them again to find myself in the weekend. Life goes by so fast and I feel like the older I get, the faster it goes. I am preparing right now to become an elementary school teacher. I have known that I have wanted to do this since I was in Junior High. The funny thing for me now is that the thought of actually teaching in about two years both scares and excites me at the same time! I feel like college truly has been a time for me to find myself and get to know myself more than I ever did before. As I have been very far from home, I have learned to be more independent. Having independence was something that I feared before. I think this is because change has always made me so nervous and uncertain. Change happens a lot while a person is in college, as they are constantly meeting new people, attending new classes, trying new things, etc.. I have learned through experience that it is better to embrace this change I speak of than to fear it.

I feel so fortunate and blessed in my life. I am attending the college of my dreams and I am living with my best friend, my sister! I have brothers to look up to and parents who love and care deeply for me. I have the BEST brothers and sisters in the world! How grateful I am for the knowledge that families are forever. This knowledge brings me hope and happiness for the future. I am so thankful for the guidance and help that the Lord gave to my family as my mother went through chemotherapy in an effort to combat her colon cancer. That time in my life could have been so much more uncertain and terrifying, yet I felt the peace that only an all-knowing and all-powerful Heavenly Father could give me during it. He comforted me and taught me that if I relied on Him and sought His guidance, recognizing that without Him, I am nothing, He would be there for me. I am so grateful for the immeasurable, invaluable blessings the Lord has bestowed upon me where my leg is concerned. I have a bone disease in the tibia of my right leg and I broke this bone four years ago. This bone is still not fully healed after four years' time. I am not afraid. My faith keeps me strong and I know that my Heavenly Father would never give to me, something which I am incapable of handling (1 Nephi 3:7). I am grateful for knowledge and the ability that I have to acquire more and more of it as I attend college.

I am so grateful for friends who sustain me and lift me up when I am down. I am so thankful for nature and all of God's beautiful and wondrous creations. I am most grateful for the knowledge that I am a daughter of God. I am precious in His sight and He loves me more than I could ever comprehend. He believes in me- He rejoices when I find joy and happiness and He feels sorrow when I struggle/go through trials. He gave His son, Jesus Christ, to the earth in order to redeem mankind. Jesus thought of me as He knelt in Gesthemane. I am sure He saw my face as He suffered in agony, while taking upon Himself the pains, sorrows, and sins of mankind. I will forever be indebted to Him for the gift He has given to me to be able to return to my Heavenly Father and become a goddess in the kingdom.

Finally, I am grateful for love. I am grateful to know that there is a young man out there, somewhere in this world, waiting for me. I pray for him and hope that he does the same for me. I want to be worthy for him. It is for this reason that I live my life in a way in which I am constantly striving to be better; to be chaste and pure. Marriage is such a sacred thing. I await with all of the earnestness and excitement in this world, the day when I will marry my soul mate. I cannot wait to have a family of my own- I cannot wait to have children to raise and love. Life can be uncertain at times. Yet, the knowledge of who I am, where I am going in life, and who I want to be gives me the will to go on. I am so grateful for all of my blessings. I should express this gratitude more. In essence, I am simply grateful to live.